depression

[Guest]

I have been on anti-depressants for a few months now and have decided to stop taking them for the cleanse. (I was on a mild dose-and was told by my doctor that I could go off of them when I thought I was ready) One thing I've noticed over the past few days is that I'm highly emotional at times and then incredibly numb. It seems like there is no in-between. I was wondering if anyone else has had this or if it might be a symptom of the medication leaving my body.

Also, would anyone suggest that I start to take the anti-depressants again or should I continue to detox without them.

I guess I'm pretty depressed in general, I don't have much energy to do anything and I don't know if it's detox symptoms or just a chemical imbalance returning.

[Res]

Hiya! :D *Hug*

Your doctor told you to go off the anti-depressant? Did you go off slowly or just stop?

I'm not a doctor (but I play one on tv *cough* sorry) ;). But I would tell you to go back on if they were helping. Perhaps getting one solid cleanse under your belt is the best bet and feeling good about it will help you to succeed. THEN, after this cleanse is finished and you feel fantastic, then toy with the idea of *weaning* yourself off of the medication.

I take armor thyroid for hypothyroidism and I take it during the cleanse. If I didn't, I'd fall flat as a pancake in exhaustion. You just do what you can. The cleanse is bunch of ups and downs as it is. Might as well make it a bit easier on yourself (and this isn't advocating eating soup and cheese on the cleanse and then wondering why you're not losing weight - for those who are wondering :P).

"Take *care* of yourself". We're here to help you on your journey. :)

Keep me posted on what you decide to do. 8)

Love,
~Res

[Guest]

I took my meds last night and had incredible nausea into this morning. I don't know if there is any connection, but I took them again this evening and I'm starting to have the nausea again.

Weird...

Anyway, I'm starting to lose hope because aside from being depressed and having an upset stomach, I'm just so tired and lethargic all the time. I'm halfway to 10 days, but I don't know if I can endure another 5 days of this.

[GucciGirl]

I have been on the stongest dose( 100mg) of zoloft for the past five years. I stoped cold turkey from the night before the cleanse. I was very aggitated on days 2 and 3 but I just kept going. I am now on day 6 and I feel so much calmer than I can remember feeling in my life. I hope this can lead to me ditching the mediaction all together.

[Peter]

Gucci Girl, it sounds like you're doing great. :)

Adalia, the first thing to check is are you doing all the elimination actions? Not eating solid food, drinking lemonade, and taking the cayenne will mobile the toxins in your body. If you then don't drink enough liquid, do the laxative tea every night, and the salt water flush or another laxative tea in the morning, you'll be mighty miserable. Toxins and any accumulated doses of drugs will make you feel bad in all sorts of ways. If you're past day 3 and feel bad the very first thing to do is ensure all the elimination actions are being done.

I cover all this in my book in the section called "The Aggitator and The Rinse Cycle." ;)

This cleanse doens't take will power, it takes knowledge.

I hope this helps,
Peter 8)

[syntaxiss]

I was taking xanax to help sleep, it has been not be needed or missed during the fast (23 days so far)

[45utahman]

23 days!!!! What added benefits is there to extending the 10 day fast beyond and at what point does it become a behavioral disorder. I remember when the IRA represtative Bobby Sands had done his hunger strike and finally died. Will you beat his record?

[sopheetsa]

dear 45utahman!

23 days!!!! *What added benefits is there to extending the 10 day fast beyond and at what point does it become a behavioral disorder. I remember when the IRA represtative Bobby Sands had done his hunger strike and finally died. Will you beat his record?

ha ha ha! *that's a VERY GOOD QUESTION! http://www.freesmileys.org/emo/happy001.gif I've been on the cleanse now 38 days and I ask myself that everyday, not per se about Bobby Sands, but same idea, for me it has to do with a joke my grandmother used to tell: The town fool http://www.freesmileys.org/emo/happy013.gif 'Nastra Din Hodja' said: "DAMN! just when I taught my horse how to stop eating--he up and DIED on me!"

A big part of my answer to your question is in my answer to another one of your posts on the thread: "Wierd stuff coming out". Others are: continued detox, cleansing & weightloss! And YES: where do you draw the line between what may SEEM like a behavioral disorder-- and what IS a behavioral disorder? Ie part of what got me to gain 30 lbs in recent memory & 20 lbs before that-- was probably "depression" or sadness, or WHATEVER you want to call it. some folks say depression is anger turned inward, and that can wreak a lot of havoc! from there, it can turn into "compulsive overeating" another behavioral disorder, and the attempt to cope with it--into other eating disorders, you name it from Anorexia to Bulemia to yes even Cleansing!

Decide for yourself! My brother, who is a world class highly cited scientist that actually works on obesity among other things, says it almost takes having an eating disorder to compensate for obesity in our times!

I would say that if you found a way to transform a lifetime of bad habits, clean out your system, and start over-- would YOU stop at 10 days if you continued to see benefit and realized that you were in the middle & not at the end of the process? I decided to trust my body, and to trust the "signs" that Peter & other more experienced cleansers have been telling us about: *ie the "tongue" as an indicator, the fact that if I'm still detoxing, I still have to keep on going! Finally: there is an "END" to fasting, which is healing, but once you get there-- you ultimately feel TRUE HUNGER! Learning to distinguish THAT from "emotional hunger" another behavioural disorder, is part of what the Cleanse can teach!

Best to you 45utahman on your cleansing/healing path!

----

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *http://www.flyinggirl.com/images/windingr.jpg

[Disappearing_Act]

Hi Everyone!!

I am so glad to have read this thread. I am now on day 34. I was feeling sad today because I couldn't eat. I feel like someone stranded in the ocean who sees mirages of land. I am thinking I am hungry but I know that it is emotional. I don't want to complain -- my weight problem made me do that all my life. I stopped complaining about my weight years ago. I did this fast for four reasons: fibroids, eczema, dry eyes, and thyroid problems. I stopped my eye and thyroid medication cold when I started this cleanse. It has been tough, but I am really surprised at myself. I want to keep going to 60 days. I will lose the weight I want and hopefully my eczema will be gone for good. The goiter in my neck is way down andI only feel exhausted in the evening after a full day. I am still eliminating -- there must have been a lot of junk in me. But I am sad. Why? Because I cannot eat. I smell food and I feel like I just broke up with a wonderful lover. I am appalled at myself. My weight has caused such anguish in life, and yet, I cannot let go for 60 days!! Now, if a problem occurs and I must get off the Master Cleanse --so be it, but that is not the case. I didn't realize how emotional this would be for me. I really almost broke down and ate three times this week. I am glad my colleague at work and my siblings and two friends are cheering me on. My colleague has a scale and I get weighed every Wed. That helps a lot. My eczema is slowly clearing up and I just try to remember that my medication for it just got a black box warning from the FDA that it could cause cancer if used long term. I want to be healthy, my tongue is still somewhat coated, but I also just want to eat??? What is going on with me? Thanx for letting me vent.

[sopheetsa]

dear Disappearing_Act:

I just came the closest EVER to eating today! My boyfriend cooked something and was eating it in the kitchen-- so as not to tempt me-- but I said-- NOO! come over here & eat! & the next thing I knew-- I was looking at his baked potato slathered with cream & chopped parsley-- and I took the plate-- carried it over to the next room-- put it down-- started digging my fork in it-- and he was laughing so hard at me! I said-- "you know-- I COULD EAT THIS RIGHT NOW!" and unbelievably-- he actually helped me NOT TO EAT IT! I kept fantasizing-- there was a post of someone who said they put the food in their moutn-- chewed it-- and then spit it out-- AND I SO WANTED TO DO THAT!

but-- even though he's been giving me a tough time about it all-- at times-- he totally supported me in that moment. he got a kick out of it-- he even took my picture "ogling" the food-- and before I read your post-- I was thinking WOW-- this is like sex or something even MORE powerful- and I MISS IT SO MUCH!

looking at all you're deaing with-- it is HUGE Disappearing_Act! wow: fibroids, eczema, dry eyes, and thyroid problems! this sounds rEALLy HARD! *and you've gone cold turkey on TWO meds! the cleanse is hard enough as it is-- and you've been on it 34 days!

I hope *you give yourself the greatest possible compassion like I'm sure you would for anyone of us-- or for someone ELSE who had to deal with everything you're dealing with! Glad to hear your eczema is clearing up.

Finally, I want you to know that I ABSOLUTELY had to vent-- a tremendous amount! I was scared to show the extent of my feelings-- but I seemed to need to-- so I started that "emotional detox" thread. I hope you feel free to talk about what's going on with you.

It is extremely difficult to do what you're doing--and I hope you appreciate the extent of it--and try to get as much support as you possibly can in every way you can, including on this board. It is a tremendous resource! I also want you to know that I support you and so do we all! But above all, please don't give yourself a hard time!

Soph

[Disappearing_Act]

Sopheesta:

You are such a gem. Thanx for your post. I admire you because you are sticking to this while with someone who is eating. That is amazing. It helps me to keep it going. I understand that baked potato moment. The next time I feel weak, I am going to coax myself out of it by saying "this is just a baked potato" moment, parsley, cream and all. I am learning about compassion -- never did have enough of that for myself. I am finally realizing how huge this is. I think that if I really thought about how huge this was, I would not have started it. So I did what I always do when faced with something huge -- I don't think about it until it is right in front of my face. But the concept of one day at a time is really sinking in. Music is a great source of help as well. My mom saw me today. She hasn't seen me since Day One of the MC. She is really against it because she thinks it is dangerous. She is a real conventional medicine gal. After seeing me, she is very enthusiastic. I even gave her some salt so that she could do the SWF in the mornings, even though she is still eating. Anyway, I am doing something I haven't done in awhile -- think about the future.

[sopheetsa]

dear Disappearing_Act

tired so i won't write long, or make a big production of it-- but thanks for what you said just here- and on the other post!

careful when you give your mom salt--make sure that SHE REALLY UNDERSTANDS how to do the SWF. i don't want to ever say a negative thing-- but I've messed it up twice now (in my 41 days..) and the most recent was just 2 days ago-- and I REALLY FELT LIKE HELL! what i think is -- worst case scenario-- and i don't mean to frighten you-- and please take this with a "grain of salt" ha ha... if someone drinks it TOO SLOWLY over the course of time-- it might get absorbed by the system.... and then.. all kinds of trouble-- I shouldn't spell it out-- but from kidney problems-- to heart.

OK, there, I've said it. also, I know people do the SWF first day coming from having had food -- the previous day, and Peter even talks about doing it with his wife-- even when they're eating-- if they've had a pretty heavy meal... but don't know (and by that I really mean I DON'T KNOW & NOT-- that I KNOW!) if it is a good idea to do day in & day out-- if you ARE eating. in fact, I keep wondering!

I think part of what makes this cleanse GREAT, is the triple header of the 1-lemonade to dissolve stuff that's lining the bowels, 2-tea as agitator and 3-SWF as rinse-- and I don't have the time to look back at your posts-- but from what I think I remember you've said-- I THINK YOU GET IT!

anyway, glad to hear what you're saying here-- especially about the FUTURE!

may yours be bright! and best to you! hope to hear more about it all-- and hope you share all the more-- on that "main board". now i'm tuckered out-- gonna sleep. by the way-- another great one here-- is Res, and she also thinks music-- is very important! (not that i don't-- i do too!)

PS: from what you said on that other thread-- i gather that your main concern now-- isn't body image-- so much as HEALTH- I DO THINK That's great! but hey-- i also care about looks! :) (my boyfriend always jokes how appearances are the only thing that matters--we've both had early cosmetic surgery to correct for cross-eyes)-- loveya! -s

[Disappearing_Act]

Thanx Sopheesta and congratulations on passing the 40 day mark. I am feeling much better. Perhaps those negative and down feelings were just being eliminated. My health is improving I hope. I feel physically stronger. I had a "baked potato" moment in Duane Reade today, and for all things -- junk food. I am hoping a strong elimination will remove that craving. Many cravings have been removed. My ofactory sense is so acute, I think I can sniff out anything. I am thinking a lot about the future, but since it has been about 12 years since I was a good weight and in good health, I am also regressing a little. It is only natural since I am pulling out "thin" clothes from the closet. My memories all have a bottom line -- low self-esteem mostly due to poor self-image due to weight problems. I greive for myself back then because I was inadequate socially and sensitive and people were unkind. But I will go forth and make amends to myself and my Creator for unduly judging myself because of my weight and giving it such power over me. But, we can only do the best we can at the time. I really have an appreciation for quality, sincerity and decency. I know that this will make relationships easier. What is happening now is an introduction to the essence of who I really am; yes, at this age in my life I am meeting myself. Once this relationship among me, myself and I is solidified, I can greet the world with confidence, love and peace. I will attract the same. I don't want to get to esoteric, but there is a lot going on inside. Until tomorrow.....

[sopheetsa]

hi Disappearing_Act :
came home (relatively early) after meeting w my boss at 3. have my period, & a headache-- probably more related to my period than the MC... altho it may be a combined effect. :)

interesting what you're saying about the cravings being "removed"! yea, smells--AH SMELLS! :)

me too-- pulling out "thinner" clothes out of the closet-- and actually wearing them-- which is incredible! each have memories.... today I wore a size six pants!! but I STILL can't fit into a size 7-8 pair that won't make it over my knees even. it is incredibly grattifying -- in a way-- but since so much of my self esteem-- is so MESSED up about the body thing-- even so-- it is all f-cked up, if you know what i mean... like saw my sister-in-law yesterday-- and she's a good 20 lbs less than me-- so STILL felt up. chalk it up to our society! (this is all shorthand....)

I'm REALLY SORRY PEOPLE WERE UNKIND! I'd SHOOT 'em for you if I could! http://www.websmileys.com/sm/violent/sterb255.gif

Congratulations for getting re-acquainted with your true NATURE! How awesome is that! and yes, I think you're right- all good things will follow-- like attracts like! :)

please feel free (if you want) to tell more of what's going on inside...

soph

[Disappearing_Act]

Hey Soph!!

Accepting my true nature and I like it. I know metaphysically things will be good! Weight is really an energy realm and now that I am losing weight -- the energy will be different. I look forward to that. I can now start to feel my spirit rising above the muck. When this is over, will I be that woman who left Sodom and turned around thus turning into a pillar of salt (or in my case a SWF [a little humor])? Or will I leave the past in the past and let the momentum carry me into the future. That is a question I will think about when I go shopping again.

I know what you mean about the self-image being all messed up. I know if I lost 50 lbs, but didn't look like so and so or I couldn't fit into a size six from a notoriously small cutting designer, I would be still peeved. But I am definitely going to change that. This cleanse has been too emptying, both physically and emotionally.

I was increadibly busy at work today. I finished work an hour ago, but I decided to do some internet work before I go home.

[sopheetsa]

Disappearing_Act: i know this is a repeat-- but very cool about "accepting true nature"-- i had a revelatory moment today-- I decided to feel "relaxed" instead of uptight about my research & how I wasn't getting it done-- to focus on cleansing.

just gonna tell you I'm impressed you were ABLE to be incredibly busy at work-- and while on the cleanse!

and now, gotto sleep-- so that i can be.

take care, keep up the good energy! (yes it is all about energy!) :)

s

[want2bfree0]

hello,
I hope I am posting in the right spot, sorry if I am not. I have been on a juice fast for 17 days. Tomorrow...day 18, I am starting the master cleanse. I have all the books and information. I am tired of the time it takes to juice with my juicer. I like the simplicity of the master cleanse. I too have been through my rounds of depression and mood swings while cleansing. The realization that I used food to stuff my feelings, became more than apparent when the food was taken away. It is all a process. I have tried the master cleanser a few times in the past but couldn't get past day 6. It just didn't sustain me at that time. I am really in hopes that it will be different this time because I have already detoxed quite a bit. I admire you all who have stayed on the cleanse so long, my goal is 40 days of fasting...at least. I hope to gain support from all you dedicated individuals. Sopheetsa, you have offered so much to many people, along with Res, this board is lucky to have you.
Hanna

[Disappearing_Act]

want2bfree0:
Welcome. It is amazing how we used food to hide our feelings. At least I know from this cleanse that feelings cannot kill.
Stick close to the bulletin board, it will help. Take each day one day at a time. That has helped me. Relax withthe memories, they don't stay but they do pack an emotional punch.

[trishaindenver]

wow all the stories i have been reading really make me feel like there are other crazy people in the world- tired of cohabitating with a person we call the present bodyor bodymindless connection...today i officially started the cleanse- celebrated last night with pizza and red wine- then drank the senna
woke up and had the liquid effect---
I did the saline wash with no problem and made the lemonade drink- ran errons and made enough juice for the road...my fiance keeps laughing at me saying i am going to cheat-
honestl-i love to eat, i use to smoke but quit 4 years ago- never lost that oral fixation- so i unfortunelty put weight on- but if i can quit smoking i can do this- i use to be hard core vegan but that changed too.... I have to say it is wonderful hearing you all are making past day 10- because i feel like if i get past day 5 it will be an act of god...
I am relatively healthy- with binging habits- and a big ass....my intention set for this is to feel i am back in control of my life....that food does not own me or the act of consumerism control me....i have not felt the pangs of hunger that those less fortunate than i suffer- this time for me is for reflection and mediation- and to gain compassion for myself and others....
thanx for listenning-way cool to have support!
ttfn t.